Well, I haven't blogged in a while. And my friend Erin is making me feel bad, so I figured I'd share some of my latest.
I am happy to say the new owner of the rat terrier (Garrett named him Killer), is so happy with him. He slept with the new owner the first night he was home. So I think it is going to work out.
Garrett was able to take his boot off this weekend. He had just got new shoes before he broke his foot. So he is now wearing one BRAND NEW shoe and one dirty muddy shoe. It is quite comical. I guess if I was a good Mom, I'd wash his shoes for him. But come on, he's THIRTEEN... if he doesn't care, should I?
So today he had a track meet. Keep in mind yesterday was his first day back without the boot. And they asked him to run the mile in the track meet. WHAAAAA????? So, I reluctantly let him go. I have to wrap his foot everyday and I figured running a mile would be better than kicking a soccer ball at soccer practice tonight. So he goes to the meet. And they decide he shouldn't run. Brotherrrrr! So the poor kid was out past 9:00, in the cold in shorts (I TOLD him to wear pants today!), hadn't eaten since lunch at school (and if you have teenage boys, you know that is DEVESTATING!). After 9:00 I texted him to see where he was..... His response? "By a bunch of trees". I kid you not, that was his answer. Yup, that's MY kid. God love 'em.
I go to tell him good night when he went to bed and I hear Blaine on the phone giving a girl friend of his (not a girlfriend but a friend that is a girl), advice on handling parents, why they do what they do, and on not letting little things bug her so much. BROTHERRRRRR... is he listening to himself? Really!? So.... I got a huge kick out of standing outside the door evesdropping. Yea, I know, I'm a mean Mom. And Grace (my shadow that follows me everywhere) is standing in the hall with me, sniffing under his door the whole time... scratching on the door. Dang Grace, quit it, you are going to get us busted! :-) Luckily Blaine couldn't hear the commotion at the door over his lips flapping giving advice on how to not be so hormonal. A lesson he needs to learn himself! haha
Tomorrow is April Fool's Day. We ALWAYS do something to my poor Boss on April Fool's Day. (yea, I know, I need to grow up.... but it is so much fun!) He made a very nice warning yesterday that April Fool's Day is also on PAYDAY. wink wink So if we wanted our paychecks, we better not be playing any jokes on him on payday. So me, being the smartass that I am, played mine today. :-) Now I hope I get my check! I sure need it!
We may be getting a foster placement soon. It sounds promising, so keep your fingers crossed and say prayers for us! I am hoping to know more tomorrow. Now, if I have to take time off from work, my Boss is going to think it's an April Fool's joke!
Well, that's about it. Hopefully tomorrow I'll have some good news to blog about.
FIVE THINGS I AM THANKFUL FOR:
1. Being a Mom. It is a gift from God and I am so thankful he has trusted me to raise His children.
2. A Boss that has a sense of humor.
3. Friends. The ones you can gripe to, cry with, laugh with....
4. A fabulous dinner at my Mom and Dad's this weekend with my brother and his girlfriend.
5. A good nights sleep.... I desperately need one!
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Saturday, March 28, 2009
Making laundry detergent
I don't know about y'all, but I spend a FORTUNE in laundry detergent. I am a fan of The Duggar's and I had seen how they make their own soap and save lots of money by doing so. So... I broke down today and bought the stuff to make my own. I had to buy the stuff to get started, but once it is all said and done it is supposed to cost $2 to wash 640 loads. Right now I spend $213 to wash 640 loads! It took me less than an hour to get it all mixed up.
Here is the "recipe" if anyone is interested.
4 Cups hot tap water
1 Fels-Naptha soap bar
1 Cup Washing Soda
½ Cup Borax-
Grate bar of soap and add to saucepan with water. Stir continually over medium-low heat until soap dissolves and is melted.-Fill a 5 gallon bucket half full of hot tap water. Add melted soap, washing soda and Borax. Stir well until all powder is dissolved. Fill bucket to top with more hot water. Stir, cover and let sit overnight to thicken.-Stir and fill a used, clean, laundry soap dispenser half full with soap and then fill rest of way with water. Shake before each use. (will gel)-Optional: You can add 10-15 drops of essential oil per 2 gallons. Add once soap has cooled.
Ideas: lavender, rosemary, tea tree oil.-
Yield: Liquid soap recipe makes 10 gallons.-
Top Load Machine- 5/8 Cup per load (Approx. 180 loads)-Front Load Machines- ¼ Cup per load (Approx. 640 loads)
I am also doing my own fabric softener. I am using option # 2 in the recipe below:
Inexpensive Fabric Softener Recipes
Recipe #1 Cup White VinegarAdd vinegar to rinse cycle. Works great. Removes residue and odors. Also helps to keep washing machine and hoses fresh and clean too.
Recipe #2 Container of Name Brand Fabric Softener4 Inexpensive sponges, cut in halfPour entire container of softener into a 5 gallon bucket. Fill empty softener container with water twice. (2 parts water to 1 part softener) Add sponges to softener/water mixture. When ready to use wring out extra mixture from one sponge and add to the dryer as you would a dryer sheet.
Here is the "recipe" if anyone is interested.
4 Cups hot tap water
1 Fels-Naptha soap bar
1 Cup Washing Soda
½ Cup Borax-
Grate bar of soap and add to saucepan with water. Stir continually over medium-low heat until soap dissolves and is melted.-Fill a 5 gallon bucket half full of hot tap water. Add melted soap, washing soda and Borax. Stir well until all powder is dissolved. Fill bucket to top with more hot water. Stir, cover and let sit overnight to thicken.-Stir and fill a used, clean, laundry soap dispenser half full with soap and then fill rest of way with water. Shake before each use. (will gel)-Optional: You can add 10-15 drops of essential oil per 2 gallons. Add once soap has cooled.
Ideas: lavender, rosemary, tea tree oil.-
Yield: Liquid soap recipe makes 10 gallons.-
Top Load Machine- 5/8 Cup per load (Approx. 180 loads)-Front Load Machines- ¼ Cup per load (Approx. 640 loads)
I am also doing my own fabric softener. I am using option # 2 in the recipe below:
Inexpensive Fabric Softener Recipes
Recipe #1 Cup White VinegarAdd vinegar to rinse cycle. Works great. Removes residue and odors. Also helps to keep washing machine and hoses fresh and clean too.
Recipe #2 Container of Name Brand Fabric Softener4 Inexpensive sponges, cut in halfPour entire container of softener into a 5 gallon bucket. Fill empty softener container with water twice. (2 parts water to 1 part softener) Add sponges to softener/water mixture. When ready to use wring out extra mixture from one sponge and add to the dryer as you would a dryer sheet.
Doggy update
Well, I am glad to say I am an Aunt! A puppy Aunt that is....
My Mom's dog had her puppies earlier this week. She took a poll on how many and I was the closest. She had 7 and my guess was 8. Two of the puppies didn't make it. :-( My Mom was such a trooper. She stayed up all night with the dog. The first one born wasn't breathing. So I spent some time online looking up tips on how to get them to breathe. My Mom even gave the puppy mouth to mouth, she tried everything and nothing worked. The last one also didn't make it. But five survived and they are so cute! Mommy dog and puppies are all doing well.
And on our stray.... HALLELUJAH! We found him a home today! A friend of Robert's brother took him. I am so glad this sweet guy found a home!!!!
My Mom's dog had her puppies earlier this week. She took a poll on how many and I was the closest. She had 7 and my guess was 8. Two of the puppies didn't make it. :-( My Mom was such a trooper. She stayed up all night with the dog. The first one born wasn't breathing. So I spent some time online looking up tips on how to get them to breathe. My Mom even gave the puppy mouth to mouth, she tried everything and nothing worked. The last one also didn't make it. But five survived and they are so cute! Mommy dog and puppies are all doing well.
And on our stray.... HALLELUJAH! We found him a home today! A friend of Robert's brother took him. I am so glad this sweet guy found a home!!!!
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Dog karma
OK, so I posted a few blogs ago about the dog that my Mom adopted. And my "guilt" at getting my parents involved because she is now pregnant. Well, I've been getting updates all day, I swear she is going to have those puppies tonight. She is almost there.
So this is where the doggy karma comes in. Sunday after Church, we had a stray dog wander up. He had a collar on with a national id, so we figured it would be easy enough to find the owners. No problem, we would do our "good deed" to man's best friend and make some sad owners really happy that they got their beloved dog back.
NOT!!!!!!! We can't get the people to call us back. So now I am stuck trying to find this sweet little guy a home. He is too sweet and has been taken care of too well to just take to the pound, knowing he'd be put to sleep.
So now, we have FIVE dogs at our house right now. Two of them males, and we are having the total "alpha male" contest going on. Yes, Zeus and his whole THREE pounds is showing this stray dog who is the alpha.
Lord, please let me find this dog a good home!
FIVE THINGS I AM THANKFUL FOR:
1. Encouraging words
2. The rain
3. My kids, my hubby, my family and my friends
4. That my Mom is still speaking to me after this whole dog pregnancy (I know, I didn't get her pregnant... but I still feel guilty because it was ME that sent her the doggy's info)
5. That a distant family member is helping us with the adoption process.
So this is where the doggy karma comes in. Sunday after Church, we had a stray dog wander up. He had a collar on with a national id, so we figured it would be easy enough to find the owners. No problem, we would do our "good deed" to man's best friend and make some sad owners really happy that they got their beloved dog back.
NOT!!!!!!! We can't get the people to call us back. So now I am stuck trying to find this sweet little guy a home. He is too sweet and has been taken care of too well to just take to the pound, knowing he'd be put to sleep.
So now, we have FIVE dogs at our house right now. Two of them males, and we are having the total "alpha male" contest going on. Yes, Zeus and his whole THREE pounds is showing this stray dog who is the alpha.
Lord, please let me find this dog a good home!
FIVE THINGS I AM THANKFUL FOR:
1. Encouraging words
2. The rain
3. My kids, my hubby, my family and my friends
4. That my Mom is still speaking to me after this whole dog pregnancy (I know, I didn't get her pregnant... but I still feel guilty because it was ME that sent her the doggy's info)
5. That a distant family member is helping us with the adoption process.
Saturday, March 21, 2009
Phew I'm tired!
Well, yesterday was the first day of spring. Blaine went to work with me to help me out and on my lunch break, we joined all the spring fever people at Home Depot. I bought 20 bags of mulch, 30 plants, fertilizer, some plant seeds and lettuce seeds.
So last night, I planted all the plants out front. This morning, Blaine and I went to work on the yard. (he has been the HUGEST help!) We pulled all the old mulch out front and put it in the flower bed out back. We put out 20 bags of mulch. He treated the ant mountains that had accumulated in the yard. I fertilized. I planted seeds. I tied up my wisteria to train it on the pergola. He cleaned the back yard. I sprayed round up on the weeds. We cleaned out and moved the bird bath.
All the while, Garrett was at the mud bogs with Uncle Shannon and Robert was out fishing at his Aunt's house. Isn't that conveeeeenient! :-)
Needless to say, we are both exhausted! But man, do my flower beds look good! Now if the grass would just grow. I had to sit out back this evening, with a glass of wine, admiring how great everything looked.
Here's a pic of the dogs watching us work out front... they crack me up!
FIVE THINGS I AM THANKFUL FOR:
1. Blaine's help! And bonding time with him.
2. Home Depot gift cards. Couldn't have done all this today without 'em!
3. Spring.
4. Hot showers!
5. The couch I am about to lay on and snuggle with Grace.
So last night, I planted all the plants out front. This morning, Blaine and I went to work on the yard. (he has been the HUGEST help!) We pulled all the old mulch out front and put it in the flower bed out back. We put out 20 bags of mulch. He treated the ant mountains that had accumulated in the yard. I fertilized. I planted seeds. I tied up my wisteria to train it on the pergola. He cleaned the back yard. I sprayed round up on the weeds. We cleaned out and moved the bird bath.
All the while, Garrett was at the mud bogs with Uncle Shannon and Robert was out fishing at his Aunt's house. Isn't that conveeeeenient! :-)
Needless to say, we are both exhausted! But man, do my flower beds look good! Now if the grass would just grow. I had to sit out back this evening, with a glass of wine, admiring how great everything looked.
Here's a pic of the dogs watching us work out front... they crack me up!
FIVE THINGS I AM THANKFUL FOR:
1. Blaine's help! And bonding time with him.
2. Home Depot gift cards. Couldn't have done all this today without 'em!
3. Spring.
4. Hot showers!
5. The couch I am about to lay on and snuggle with Grace.
Thursday, March 19, 2009
Spring break
So yesterday, I took the day off to spend with the boys. We were going to Six Flags, until Blaine told me he didn't want to ride any rides. Garrett is like me (bless his heart) and does NOT like heights, so he wouldn't be riding either. No way am I spending all that money to just walk around. And pay $15 to PARK to walk around... Not happening! I wanted to take them paintballing, but Garrett is still in his boot and I didn't want to ruin it. Can't rock climb... the boot again.
So, we opted for a fun day at Shenaniganz. It is a cool new place in town. They have bowling, laser tag, rock climbing, video games and indoor gokarts. We ate lunch there and the boys did all of the above except for rock climbing and gokarts. They were packed, so we got to bowl in the private lounge area. It was awesome... we were the only people in there and we all had a blast. Robert joined us when he got off work. So we all bowled (again, yes we bowled the day before too, different place though), we laughed, we totally had a blast.
Today it was back to work. My 2 Co-Workers are off today and tomorrow so that makes for stressful days!
Robert took Blaine to the Dermatologist today. This kid has acne that won't stop. We have literally tried EVERYTHING under the sun. So he gave Blaine an arsenal of prescriptions. He told him to stop using all the products he is using now and use Dove soap to wash his face. Are you kidding me???? DOVE SOAP? I have spent a FORTUNE on cleansers over the last 2 years and Dove soap is supposed to do the trick!? We'll see. I have about $200 in prescriptions to get tomorrow. Lord, I hope this works. This kid is miserable!
FIVE THINGS I AM THANKFUL FOR:
1. The absolutely perfect, beautiful, couldn't ask for anything nicer weather that we've had this week.
2. Activities with my kids (and that they still WANT to do stuff with MOM!)
3. Blaine offering to go to work with me tomorrow to help me out, what a sweet kid!
4. All my plants that are coming up from the seeds I planted last year.
5. That tomorrow is Friday!!!!!!!
So, we opted for a fun day at Shenaniganz. It is a cool new place in town. They have bowling, laser tag, rock climbing, video games and indoor gokarts. We ate lunch there and the boys did all of the above except for rock climbing and gokarts. They were packed, so we got to bowl in the private lounge area. It was awesome... we were the only people in there and we all had a blast. Robert joined us when he got off work. So we all bowled (again, yes we bowled the day before too, different place though), we laughed, we totally had a blast.
Today it was back to work. My 2 Co-Workers are off today and tomorrow so that makes for stressful days!
Robert took Blaine to the Dermatologist today. This kid has acne that won't stop. We have literally tried EVERYTHING under the sun. So he gave Blaine an arsenal of prescriptions. He told him to stop using all the products he is using now and use Dove soap to wash his face. Are you kidding me???? DOVE SOAP? I have spent a FORTUNE on cleansers over the last 2 years and Dove soap is supposed to do the trick!? We'll see. I have about $200 in prescriptions to get tomorrow. Lord, I hope this works. This kid is miserable!
FIVE THINGS I AM THANKFUL FOR:
1. The absolutely perfect, beautiful, couldn't ask for anything nicer weather that we've had this week.
2. Activities with my kids (and that they still WANT to do stuff with MOM!)
3. Blaine offering to go to work with me tomorrow to help me out, what a sweet kid!
4. All my plants that are coming up from the seeds I planted last year.
5. That tomorrow is Friday!!!!!!!
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
A great day with the boys
Well, today I took a half day off work to spend with the boys for Spring Break. I have been wanting to take the boys pics for quite some time now, but it has just been so dang cold. Today was sinfully BEAUTIFUL! So I HADDDDD to take some pics of them. They were both great sports and I got some fabulous pics of them.
After that, we went to lunch. Then we went bowling. And I beat both of them! haha We had a great time laughing and being goofy. Then to Braum's for ice cream. Yum!
I am off tomorrow too, but not sure what we are going to do. I hope it was as much fun as we had today!
After that, we went to lunch. Then we went bowling. And I beat both of them! haha We had a great time laughing and being goofy. Then to Braum's for ice cream. Yum!
I am off tomorrow too, but not sure what we are going to do. I hope it was as much fun as we had today!
Monday, March 16, 2009
My parents are going to killllll me!
Ok, y'all all know how I LOVE dogs. All of our dogs are rescues, we've fostered dogs, I try to find homes for dogs all the time. I am the epitome of "the crazy dog lady" and I wear that title proudly. (I know, I shouldn't)
Well, about a month ago I found this little dog that was on Craig's List, about to be euthanized. My Mom had toyed with the idea of getting another dog, so I sent her the listing. If she didn't want her, then I was going to take her, foster her and find her a home. My Mom contacted the shelter, someone had already called for her and they were on the way there. So my Mom was second on the list. The other people came and got her, kept her a few days and brought her back. They claimed that "their other dog didn't take to her too well".
Y'all see where this is going, right!?
Yea.... I think the other dog took to her TOO well!
My Mom has noticed her getting really fat, teets dragging the ground. YEP... she is pregnant! And too pregnant to get spayed.
So my Mom and Dad are soon to be the proud parents to puppies. And I know they are cussing me profusely! I have promised to help find homes for the puppies, so if anyone local needs a puppy, they should be ready in 8 weeks. :-)
Mom and Dad..... I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :-)
FIVE THINGS I AM THANKFUL FOR:
1. A beautiful day today
2. The "raise" that President Obama gave me on my paycheck today. (although I am very worried about the reprocutions of that "increase in pay")
3. God's grace
4. I made it through my first day back at work after being gone 2 1/2 days
5. The chocolate cake that Blaine made last night.
Well, about a month ago I found this little dog that was on Craig's List, about to be euthanized. My Mom had toyed with the idea of getting another dog, so I sent her the listing. If she didn't want her, then I was going to take her, foster her and find her a home. My Mom contacted the shelter, someone had already called for her and they were on the way there. So my Mom was second on the list. The other people came and got her, kept her a few days and brought her back. They claimed that "their other dog didn't take to her too well".
Y'all see where this is going, right!?
Yea.... I think the other dog took to her TOO well!
My Mom has noticed her getting really fat, teets dragging the ground. YEP... she is pregnant! And too pregnant to get spayed.
So my Mom and Dad are soon to be the proud parents to puppies. And I know they are cussing me profusely! I have promised to help find homes for the puppies, so if anyone local needs a puppy, they should be ready in 8 weeks. :-)
Mom and Dad..... I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :-)
FIVE THINGS I AM THANKFUL FOR:
1. A beautiful day today
2. The "raise" that President Obama gave me on my paycheck today. (although I am very worried about the reprocutions of that "increase in pay")
3. God's grace
4. I made it through my first day back at work after being gone 2 1/2 days
5. The chocolate cake that Blaine made last night.
Sunday, March 15, 2009
Finally feeling better
Well, as of today I am finally starting to feel better. I have been cooped up in this house since Wednesday at lunch when I came home from work. Today, I am starting to feel human again. Hooray!
I had to get out and do SOMETHING today... didn't feel like doing much. So Blaine and I pulled weeds in the flower bed out back for a while. It was in the low 60's, so I didn't even break a sweat. Garrett came out after a while and helped rake up the big pile of weeds that we had pulled. I just love my boys!!!! We had fun, we talked, Blaine threw grub worms at me, we had a good time.
And that wore me out. :-) But my flower bed out back looks great and I am ready to plant new plants!!!!
And I am done with my tyrate on adoption. Life must go on. But man, oh man, do I want to call that worker back that picked us for the little boy and tell her we are on our way to San Antonio!!!!!!!
Blaine said he'd rather have a little brother anyways. His reason? Because he "doesn't want his stuff bedazzled and all glitterfied and a little girl would do that". hahaha Then we got into the topic of tea parties, and I told him I would soooooooo be taking pictures of that and posting on my Myspace and Facebook. I love giving my kids a hard time, can ya' tell?
So it has been a good day. Spring break is this week, so now we are planning what to do and what days to do it. I should be able to take one or two days off to do something with the kids....
FIVE THINGS I AM THANKFUL FOR:
1. My boys.... need I say more?
2. My Hubby taking care of pretty much EVERYTHING while I've been sick.
3. Springtime.
4. Starting to feel "normal" (whatever that is!)
5. A Boss that makes family first priority.... that is soooo hard to find and I am so fortunate.
I had to get out and do SOMETHING today... didn't feel like doing much. So Blaine and I pulled weeds in the flower bed out back for a while. It was in the low 60's, so I didn't even break a sweat. Garrett came out after a while and helped rake up the big pile of weeds that we had pulled. I just love my boys!!!! We had fun, we talked, Blaine threw grub worms at me, we had a good time.
And that wore me out. :-) But my flower bed out back looks great and I am ready to plant new plants!!!!
And I am done with my tyrate on adoption. Life must go on. But man, oh man, do I want to call that worker back that picked us for the little boy and tell her we are on our way to San Antonio!!!!!!!
Blaine said he'd rather have a little brother anyways. His reason? Because he "doesn't want his stuff bedazzled and all glitterfied and a little girl would do that". hahaha Then we got into the topic of tea parties, and I told him I would soooooooo be taking pictures of that and posting on my Myspace and Facebook. I love giving my kids a hard time, can ya' tell?
So it has been a good day. Spring break is this week, so now we are planning what to do and what days to do it. I should be able to take one or two days off to do something with the kids....
FIVE THINGS I AM THANKFUL FOR:
1. My boys.... need I say more?
2. My Hubby taking care of pretty much EVERYTHING while I've been sick.
3. Springtime.
4. Starting to feel "normal" (whatever that is!)
5. A Boss that makes family first priority.... that is soooo hard to find and I am so fortunate.
Friday, March 13, 2009
Haven't posted in a while
Well, I haven't posted in a while... and I'm sure there is SOMEONE out there somewhere missing me ramble on and on. :-) Yea right!
Last week started off with these hives. Absolutely miserable hives. Then I got this cold/flu thing going on. Haven't been to work since Wednesday. And quite frankly, I am getting bored of looking at this house. I still don't feel good, or I'd have gone out of my mind cooped up in this house by now.
I got an email today that we were NOT selected for the little girl that we were hoping for. Talk about devestating. When I don't feel good, I cry. So needless to say, there have been lots of tears shed today.
Most people don't "get it". If God hasn't put the desire to adopt in your heart, you truly don't understand how daunting the adoption process is. We have been approved to adopt for over 2 years now. We have been selected twice and had to say no. We have been "runner up" more times than I can count. So every single time we are not selected, it is devestating. I try not to take it personal... but after this long, how can one NOT take it personal? I am wondering today what is it in our homestudy that sends Caseworkers running the other way? Do we look like freaks? Do they even take time to read our FIFTY SEVEN page home study? Is there something in there that screams RUN!!!!!! ? What is the friggin' deal? We aren't perfect, but we are a great family with a lot of love to give.... I guess that isn't enough.
So after getting that news, I cried myself to sleep (give me a break, I don't feel good so my emotions are on overdrive). I will NEVER do that again... going to sleep upset about adoption. I dreamed about Troy and Tori, that we were helping them move... I dreamed that I found two twin 9 month old girls on TARE (state photolisting of kids available for adoption)... and I dreamed we were selected for a boy and girl sibling group and they were coming home soon. Talk about torture.
I know, I know... IT'S ALL IN GOD'S TIME. I truly know that.
But today I am mad. I am mad that I had to say no to that precious little boy last week (even though that is NOT what IIIIIIII wanted to say). I am mad that God has put this desire in my heart to adopt. I am mad that some people get matched immediately. I am mad that some people like us sit and wait forever until they eventually give up. I am mad that people that don't even know us get to judge us on a huge packet of paper. I am mad that children get abused by their foster/adoptive families, while we sit here waiting for another child that we would NEVER harm. I am mad mad MAD.
So as of today.... I have pledged to myself that I will no longer think about what I don't have. I won't think about the child that God HASN'T given me. I will only think about the children that He HAS given me, and I will continue to be thankful for every single moment with them.
FIVE THINGS I AM THANKFUL FOR:
1. Listening to my Hubby and kids laughing tonight. Helped me put things back in perspective.
2. The rain. 3 solid days of it (and being cold) is enough, but we sure needed the rain.
3. Time to snuggle with my dogs when I'm not feeling good.
4. Ice cream.
5. Nyquil....
Last week started off with these hives. Absolutely miserable hives. Then I got this cold/flu thing going on. Haven't been to work since Wednesday. And quite frankly, I am getting bored of looking at this house. I still don't feel good, or I'd have gone out of my mind cooped up in this house by now.
I got an email today that we were NOT selected for the little girl that we were hoping for. Talk about devestating. When I don't feel good, I cry. So needless to say, there have been lots of tears shed today.
Most people don't "get it". If God hasn't put the desire to adopt in your heart, you truly don't understand how daunting the adoption process is. We have been approved to adopt for over 2 years now. We have been selected twice and had to say no. We have been "runner up" more times than I can count. So every single time we are not selected, it is devestating. I try not to take it personal... but after this long, how can one NOT take it personal? I am wondering today what is it in our homestudy that sends Caseworkers running the other way? Do we look like freaks? Do they even take time to read our FIFTY SEVEN page home study? Is there something in there that screams RUN!!!!!! ? What is the friggin' deal? We aren't perfect, but we are a great family with a lot of love to give.... I guess that isn't enough.
So after getting that news, I cried myself to sleep (give me a break, I don't feel good so my emotions are on overdrive). I will NEVER do that again... going to sleep upset about adoption. I dreamed about Troy and Tori, that we were helping them move... I dreamed that I found two twin 9 month old girls on TARE (state photolisting of kids available for adoption)... and I dreamed we were selected for a boy and girl sibling group and they were coming home soon. Talk about torture.
I know, I know... IT'S ALL IN GOD'S TIME. I truly know that.
But today I am mad. I am mad that I had to say no to that precious little boy last week (even though that is NOT what IIIIIIII wanted to say). I am mad that God has put this desire in my heart to adopt. I am mad that some people get matched immediately. I am mad that some people like us sit and wait forever until they eventually give up. I am mad that people that don't even know us get to judge us on a huge packet of paper. I am mad that children get abused by their foster/adoptive families, while we sit here waiting for another child that we would NEVER harm. I am mad mad MAD.
So as of today.... I have pledged to myself that I will no longer think about what I don't have. I won't think about the child that God HASN'T given me. I will only think about the children that He HAS given me, and I will continue to be thankful for every single moment with them.
FIVE THINGS I AM THANKFUL FOR:
1. Listening to my Hubby and kids laughing tonight. Helped me put things back in perspective.
2. The rain. 3 solid days of it (and being cold) is enough, but we sure needed the rain.
3. Time to snuggle with my dogs when I'm not feeling good.
4. Ice cream.
5. Nyquil....
Saturday, March 7, 2009
Mom's day out
I had the most fabulous day today.... I got to spend all day with my friend Sabrina, no kids all day long! I haven't been able to do that in almost a year, and it was wayyyyyyyyy past time!
We went to a children's consignment sale in Dallas. It was so hard to not buy some little girl clothes.... JUST IN CASE. But I refrained. Then we went to The Original Pancake House and ate breakfast, YUM! They have THE BEST coffee EVER! Then went shopping and then went back to her house. We took down Audrey's crib, put up her "big girl bed" and arranged her room. Then off to Pancho and Lefty's for a margarita. Then finished the day off shopping at Ross.
It was so nice to not hear "mom, mom, momma, mommy, mom, mom.....". Don't get me wrong, I love my kids, I love doing for my kids. But it sure was nice to have a day doing what I want to do! We laughed, we people watched, we worked, we shopped.... it was a great day!
And Audrey was precious when she saw her new big girl room!
All this fun despite 3 hives outbreaks today. Y'all... I am a red whelted mess. I have broke out in hives all week, and 3 times today. I have never had hives in my LIFE, and I am miserable!!!! If this keeps up, I'm going to have to go get a shot or something.
FIVE THINGS I AM THANKFUL FOR:
1. Today....and a wonderful lunch with my Mom yesterday
2. The BEAUTIFUL weather today
3. Good food, good coffee, and good friends
4. My kids. Around 8:00 tonight, Garrett texted me wanting to know where I was. I think he missed me! :-)
5. A husband that lets me go do what I want, no questions asked, because he KNEW I desperately needed some time to myself.
We went to a children's consignment sale in Dallas. It was so hard to not buy some little girl clothes.... JUST IN CASE. But I refrained. Then we went to The Original Pancake House and ate breakfast, YUM! They have THE BEST coffee EVER! Then went shopping and then went back to her house. We took down Audrey's crib, put up her "big girl bed" and arranged her room. Then off to Pancho and Lefty's for a margarita. Then finished the day off shopping at Ross.
It was so nice to not hear "mom, mom, momma, mommy, mom, mom.....". Don't get me wrong, I love my kids, I love doing for my kids. But it sure was nice to have a day doing what I want to do! We laughed, we people watched, we worked, we shopped.... it was a great day!
And Audrey was precious when she saw her new big girl room!
All this fun despite 3 hives outbreaks today. Y'all... I am a red whelted mess. I have broke out in hives all week, and 3 times today. I have never had hives in my LIFE, and I am miserable!!!! If this keeps up, I'm going to have to go get a shot or something.
FIVE THINGS I AM THANKFUL FOR:
1. Today....and a wonderful lunch with my Mom yesterday
2. The BEAUTIFUL weather today
3. Good food, good coffee, and good friends
4. My kids. Around 8:00 tonight, Garrett texted me wanting to know where I was. I think he missed me! :-)
5. A husband that lets me go do what I want, no questions asked, because he KNEW I desperately needed some time to myself.
Thursday, March 5, 2009
Phewwww
Well, the respite boys went home last night. phewwww, it has been a crazy week! The boys were so good, it was just pretty chaotic. It is hard when you live out of a bag and don't know how long you are staying. And the hardest part was getting everyone ready, out the door on time and carpooling by myself.
The last day they were here, this is how our morning went. I forgot to give one his medication, so I had to take it to him at the bus stop. Blaine forgot he had "jeans" day at school so he had to come home to change. We couldn't find the youngest one's belt (still haven't found it....). Dropped Garrett and carpool kiddo off at school and realized he didn't have his belt on, had to go home and get it so he didn't get a detention (yesssss, they give detentions for non-compliance of dress code). AND, I forgot my cell phone, so I had to go home and get it (adoption stuff, can't be w/o cell phone!).
So, with all that going on, we were selected as the family for a little 3 year old boy. He is absolutely adorable. Brown curly hair and the biggest blue eyes you've ever seen. But, we had to turn down the placement. I am not happy about it.... it is so hard to say no when you have wanted something so long. This makes the second child we have had to turn down, and it is a horribly tough thing to do.
And there is a little girl we are being considered for. We may (hopefully) be doing respite for her so we can form a relationship/bond with her. Waiting to hear back from the caseworker on that....
FIVE THINGS I AM THANKFUL FOR:
1. Quiet... PEACE AND QUIET.... those times where God gives you direction when you need it the most.
2. Spring! I spent an hour and a half pulling weeds and cleaning my flower bed out back this evening. Gardening, it is therapy from God.
3. My Mammaw's blanket. Days like I had yesterday, I want nothing more than to be wrapped up in that blanket...
4. The kiss on the forehead that Garrett gave me tonight.
5. My front load washer... having 6 to wash for this week, couldn't imagine not having it!
The last day they were here, this is how our morning went. I forgot to give one his medication, so I had to take it to him at the bus stop. Blaine forgot he had "jeans" day at school so he had to come home to change. We couldn't find the youngest one's belt (still haven't found it....). Dropped Garrett and carpool kiddo off at school and realized he didn't have his belt on, had to go home and get it so he didn't get a detention (yesssss, they give detentions for non-compliance of dress code). AND, I forgot my cell phone, so I had to go home and get it (adoption stuff, can't be w/o cell phone!).
So, with all that going on, we were selected as the family for a little 3 year old boy. He is absolutely adorable. Brown curly hair and the biggest blue eyes you've ever seen. But, we had to turn down the placement. I am not happy about it.... it is so hard to say no when you have wanted something so long. This makes the second child we have had to turn down, and it is a horribly tough thing to do.
And there is a little girl we are being considered for. We may (hopefully) be doing respite for her so we can form a relationship/bond with her. Waiting to hear back from the caseworker on that....
FIVE THINGS I AM THANKFUL FOR:
1. Quiet... PEACE AND QUIET.... those times where God gives you direction when you need it the most.
2. Spring! I spent an hour and a half pulling weeds and cleaning my flower bed out back this evening. Gardening, it is therapy from God.
3. My Mammaw's blanket. Days like I had yesterday, I want nothing more than to be wrapped up in that blanket...
4. The kiss on the forehead that Garrett gave me tonight.
5. My front load washer... having 6 to wash for this week, couldn't imagine not having it!
Monday, March 2, 2009
Family life book
I am trying out digital scrapbooking. I need to update our family life book for the adoption, since ours was done 3 years ago... let me know what you think!
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| Make a Smilebox scrapbook |
Sunday, March 1, 2009
I never realized....
I never realized HOW MUCH laundry and dishes 4 kids can dirty up. I swear I have done 3 loads of dishes a day this weekend! And STILL doing laundry at 11:00!
We are keeping our friends' foster kids. So our house has been hopping this weekend, it has been fun though. All the boys have been good. I just wish there was some more estrogen to mix in with all this testosterone in testosteroneville!!!!!
I am worried about how tomorrow morning will go.... Robert leaves early in the morning, so I am here to get 4 boys ready for school and to school (all 4 different schools!) by myself. Foster dad is coming to get one of the boys and take him, and I'll take the other 3 plus my carpool kiddo. OK, I'm getting tired just thinking about tomorrow morning.
But it's all good..... I will manage! With enough Diet Coke, I can conquer just about anything.
FIVE THINGS I AM THANKFUL FOR:
1. My warm bed..... it is soooooo calling my name!
2. Hot bubble baths.
3. The beautiful weather we had today.
4. My Mom. I just love her!
5. Laughing with my kids.
We are keeping our friends' foster kids. So our house has been hopping this weekend, it has been fun though. All the boys have been good. I just wish there was some more estrogen to mix in with all this testosterone in testosteroneville!!!!!
I am worried about how tomorrow morning will go.... Robert leaves early in the morning, so I am here to get 4 boys ready for school and to school (all 4 different schools!) by myself. Foster dad is coming to get one of the boys and take him, and I'll take the other 3 plus my carpool kiddo. OK, I'm getting tired just thinking about tomorrow morning.
But it's all good..... I will manage! With enough Diet Coke, I can conquer just about anything.
FIVE THINGS I AM THANKFUL FOR:
1. My warm bed..... it is soooooo calling my name!
2. Hot bubble baths.
3. The beautiful weather we had today.
4. My Mom. I just love her!
5. Laughing with my kids.
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